Ground squirrels

In the tall grass, as I bike up to campus, a ground squirrel and a pigeon busy themselves, side by side. I imagine a parody of modern science: establish a study of the bike-path-crossing patterns followed by ground squirrels. Get one hundred students to mark how many squirrels crossed their path, and in what direction. Do this over one hundred days, whether students are on their way up or down, and at different hours. In a second phase, introduce electronic devices to do the counting. Theory: squirrels become aware of their environment and learn from it, or don’t learn and get psychologically bruised. Goal of the study: examine whether squirrels develop consciousness of incoming wheeled objects. Application: develop safety electronic alarms to warn squirrels of impending traffic. Follow-up study aiming at answering this question: do squirrels learn to disregard electronic signals and warnings? do mama squirrels warn their babies about the possibility that one moving wheeled vehicle may hide another one? Establish a protocol for signal-emitting mama squirrels, etc…. Ah, I made it to the library.